ON RETREAT IN DAILY LIFE

Irene Cheung

I started the three-week Ignation ‘Retreat in Daily Life for Busy People’ with the aim of seeking God’s help in understanding myself better and to allow God’s words to nourish and restore my inner self. I wanted a heart that would not question God’s will, but would thirst for and run after God’s will above anything else.

The retreat requires a commitment of 20 minutes each day for the three weeks and time with my spiritual director once each week. It works best if one sets aside time every day to read a passage of Scripture that has been meaningful to me from the past few days or one of the Scripture passages given to me by my spiritual director, and to do the suggested exercises and reflections. It was hard stuff and I needed to concentrate and stop and reflect and absorb. It was almost like a ‘review’.

I had a wonderful spiritual director who helped me sort out my questions and feelings on the very topics presented in the three short weeks of the Retreat. I came to the true realisation that God knows me and reaches out for me before I even know to reach for him.

When I began the retreat I was struggling to see the purpose of my whole life. I am involved in my parish work, in my son’s school and in the Jesuit Mission, but in little ways, and I am not sure I am on the right path, really doing God’s will. Sometimes I feel inadequate and that I am not doing things right because, despite my every effort, they don’t seem to turn out perfectly.

I prayed that I might know where my path is leading me, but I recognise that each of us must go down the path God has laid for us, for God knows what is best for each of us.

As a ‘busy person’ I race against time to get everything done. As a result, at the end of a day I am exhausted, with very little to show for my efforts. I hoped the retreat would help to make my time more meaningful.

Week 1. My spiritual director suggested a good way to make the retreat effective is to keep a journal. Two points provided a focus:

1. What have I been asking for this week?
2. What am I grateful for having received?

Reflecting on these questions each week allowed me to notice and track patterns developing my desiring and in the graces God is giving me. I felt that I was not doing this ‘alone’ but God was working in me and showering graces upon me in so many ways. Through prayer and reflection on these questions I discovered a rhythm and balance that help me live more attentively and lovingly.

Week 2 helped me renew my faith. I had a wonderful experience of celebrating the ‘Last Supper’ Mass at a long table and I found the real meaning of the bread and the wine. Now I have come to know that I must have in mind the image of Jesus calling me to be taken, blessed, broken and given, that my life might be poured out into service of others.

Week 3. I found great comfort looking at the crucified Jesus on the cross, knowing that he will not forsake me. In situations that require facing everyday tensions at home and outside, I need to remember to imitate Jesus. He kept faithful, he kept going, and he kept loving.

This retreat has strengthened my prayer life as well as lifted me up spiritually. I feel more loved and closer to Jesus and I think I always was loved. The retreat has taught me to live with the beginning awareness of those decision points where I can choose to focus on myself or on God.

I now have learnt different ways of praying. I was introduced to Lectio Divina. Through Lectio I am given a chance to encounter daily the revealed Word of God in Scripture. Through the Word, God comes to speak to the deepest places in my heart. In this deep listening I am challenged, changed and comforted by God.

The actual process is as simple as it can be transforming. The first step is Lectio or reading. Take a short passage of Scripture and read over it slowly and carefully. What word or phrase seems to make me stop? Take that word or phrase and repeat it slowly to myself several times.

The next step is Meditatio or meditation. Ponder the word or phrase that came to me. How is it speaking to me? Where does it lead me? What does it remind me of? Spend some time listening to where it takes me. Meditation is really very simple — quieting the usual ‘busy-ness’ of mind and spirit.

Next, let the meditation become Oratio or prayer. Turn the insights of my mediation into a prayer. It may be a prayer of thanksgiving, a plea for help, and a request for the strength to change. This prayer is simply offering to God whatever came from my insights in meditation.

Thank you, Lord, for your constant presence in my life.